BRINKLEY!

Internet round-up for the week of August 15, 2022

Good morning (or afternoon, for those of you living in the future) and happy Friday! Don’t mind me, just ignoring a spam call. I’ve had to make tons of logistical phone calls in the past couple of weeks (and still more to do — sigh — moving) and needed to get some calls back, so I turned off that feature that sends every call from an unknown number directly to voicemail. WOW. HUGE MISTAKE.

Okay, to be fair, I did manage to actually receive the call I was waiting for, but also a whole bunch that I was not waiting for. Gross. I did see this week that they’re cracking down on the “we’re trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty” jazz, but we’ll see how long that lasts. As someone who worked in the telephony field for a number of years, I know they’re making it harder to spoof numbers…but it’s certainly not impossible.

Anywho, let’s get to the business at hand: things I found on the internet this week.

I’m Being Personally Attacked

Lauren Hough @laurenthehough

Last time I tried to move an image in a word doc

This, except it’s me trying to add a “subscribe to my Substack” button to my website (it’s kelleygreene.pizza, for anyone wondering — and yes, I find paying for a .pizza domain a very good use of my money).

I *think* it worked. If it looks wonky, let me know.

You know what, never mind. Just tell me it looks great.

𝔪𝔢𝔤 @bymeg

my bf driving us through my hometown: 👨 🚘 me: that’s the hardware store where my friend maria worked, once i got pulled over at that stop sign, we’d turn here if we were going to my grandma’s house, this is where the high school is, we drive thru this park to see christmas li

Okay but let me show you the ditch with the little tiny bridge where my dad drove me to school in our golf cart (not used for playing golf, only used for cruising for candy on Halloween and viewing Christmas lights) one day when his car wouldn’t start!

Also this is the Wal-Mart, which got built when I was in high school and became THE hangout. After, we’ll eat at Gringo’s! (Sorry not sorry for the link, I looked at it and I’m hungry now so everyone has to suffer.)

annika🌈🦋🪩🪷 @annoyingannika

Rude and unfair.

brincels anonymous @thatssokeshaun

the worst part of being a good listener is that people get creeped out by the information I've retained about them just from listening

I just — I cannot count the number of times that I’ve elected not to mention information I knew/remembered about someone because I realized it was going to make me look like a total creep.

This also reminds me of the scene in You’ve Got Mail where Tom Hanks brings Meg Ryan daisies and she says “these are my favorite flower” and he says “you told me” — and she DID but she told him like the VERY FIRST TIME THEY MET and he remembered it and it’s so sweet and Nora Ephron really — sorry, I just rewatched this about 3 weeks ago for the first time as an adult and it’s still really great. That’s all.

Actual footage of me preparing to write this newsletter

10 points if you figured out the subject line reference before reaching this point.

trash jones @jzux

ah i’d love to but i’ve got a busy day today

I…

I think I need a nap.

Wholesome Fun

Liz Climo @elclimo

I cannot get over how cute this is.

I’m Blinding You With Science

Ooooh, genetics, one of my favorite subjects.

𝕻𝖆𝖗𝖆𝖘𝖔𝖈𝖎𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 @parasociality

A hierarchy of alienness: Pictures of animals from least to most related to you. Least-related animal: Sponges. You and sponges are both animals. That's basically all you've got in common.

This is extremely cool. It’s a long thread of different animals and how much they have in common with humans (basically how far derived we are from our common ancestor). Definitely worth a read.

Herstory

And now on to one of my other favorite academic topics, anthropology. It’s so easy to misread artifacts without an understanding of society at the time it was made (no mirrors!).

Σ('◉⌓◉’) @na74362408

ancient paleolithic venus statues were likely made by women who were examining their own bodies and sculpting them from their own first person POV, rather than, as previously assumed, exaggerated features from an outside perspective.

Very rad to now have a better interpretation of this ancient art.

Randomly Selected Animal Cutie

@miasayoko_This is what happens when you happen to have a corgi, a watermelon, and a diy queen best friend @yydsjb12

Tiktok failed to load.

Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser

Have a great week y’all!

Steve Stewart-Williams @SteveStuWill

Peace was never an option

Be careful out there.

K