Happy Friday, everyone!
I am thrilled to announce that I have finally made the pilgrimage to my personal paradise: The Pacifica Taco Bell.
The drive over to Pacifica from Mountain View was fabulous — up 280, over to Highway 1 through gorgeous mountains and trees and then along the beach. It was 83 degrees when we left, and I thought “Well, it’s summer! I don’t want to be hot,” so I wore shorts, and then watched the temperature slowly drop as we made our way to the other side of the peninsula.
When we got there it was 59 degrees. FIFTY NINE DEGREES AT THE END OF JUNE. California truly has the most confusing weather in the world. Back in Chicago, we’d laugh over days that went from sun > snow > rain and back. In California, you drive 45 minutes and the temperature drops 24 degrees even though it’s still sunny (just foggy). But I digress.
The Taco Bell was really cute — it has a big glass fireplace and a lovely balcony overlooking the beach. Plus, they serve those yardstick margaritas with real booze since they’re one of the Cantina locations (just a fountain drink for yours truly, though). The food was excellent. My cheesy gordita crunches were cheesy and crunchy and…gordita-y.
They also had a little cabinet full of merch! Unfortunately they were out of sweatshirts, which I desperately wanted because I was freezing (obviously makes sense why they were out of them, though), but I did end up getting a t-shirt. Which I later realized has a..bottle opener sewn into the bottom of it? So as soon as I find my fabric scissors it’s getting turned into a crop. They also had bikinis, but unfortunately none in my size. Anyway, I can’t wait to go back, but in long pants.
Otherwise, the week has been relatively mellow. I’m mostly just excited that it’s been staying sunny and is really starting to get hot. It’s supposed to get up to 88 today and I’m thrilled. I will say — the one thing I do really miss here is a hot summer night. You know, when it’s been boiling all day, and the sun goes down, and it’s cooler but it’s still warm? You still want to hang out outside in shorts, or go into the pool that’s somehow still like 75 degrees, and have a cold drink. Around here, once it gets dark, it’s jacket weather. It’s nice that it never gets too hot, but I am a Texan by birth, and I need a summer evening that’s still warm out. Preferably without mosquitos, though.
I’m still coming down off last week’s sub drama, but have, nevertheless, corralled some goods for ya:
I’m Being Personally Attacked
I just — look, I spent so much time making sure the email was *perfect* — dammit. Love to have to send a follow-up that’s like “Here’s the thing I said I attached the first time” or “Email Part 2: Now With Attachments!”
I don’t deserve this!! I am a good person.
A good person who also cannot comfortably ride in the backseat of an Uber maybe — ever? My eyes must remained trained on the world outside. My window must be cracked so I can get fresh air. My driver must not have used any of the official Uber Driver Cologne™ they seem to issue when dudes sign up. Then, and only then, I have a small chance of making it to my destination without being queasy.
I bought some of those “anti-carsick” glasses that make you look like a lunatic for our cross-country drive but didn’t end up using them (probably because I a) didn’t spend much time on my phone and b) was in the front seat). Maybe I’ll try them next time I have to catch a ride to the airport. 😎
Wholesome Fun
Have I ever mentioned to you guys that Happy Gilmore is my favorite movie?
Well, Happy Gilmore is my favorite movie. I think I might be able to recite the whole film basically from memory. So imagine my surprise when I saw this week that there is now a REAL Happy Gilmore, and he’s a golfer!
I also spotted this in the replies:
“Next to tee off: Lafferty, Daniel and Gilmore, Happy.”
Now if Happy can just get himself a Subway endorsement, he’ll really be in business.
I also saw this tweet about a Lidl with Norse ruins in the floor, and it sent me digging for info. The Lidl in question is in Dublin, and opened in 2020.
I think this is so cool!! It turns out there’s a number of places like this — a Starbucks in Varna, Bulgaria, a McDonald’s in Marino, Italy, and even an H&M in Lisbon! If I’m honest, there’s a good chance I’ll be less inclined to shop while at one of these spots and more likely to completely disassociate while I think about the expansiveness of time, the never ending march toward death, and the fact that I’m standing on someone’s house.
Friday Fupdate
A quick update on one of our previous TMI topics of discussion:
Remember Baby Gronk? You know, the one who was getting rizzed up by Livvy and could be the new Drip King?
It turns out real Gronk, adult Gronk, the one whose name actually has “Gronk” in it, is getting a little tired of Baby Gronk’s dad. He’s planning to send a cease and desist. In his words, “Yeah, it’s to a point where it’s awkward. It’s too far.” Gronk needs to like, trademark “Gronk”? I guess?
Or, alternatively: we all start using “Gronk” as a nickname. Could we get Livvy to rizz up Yo-Yo Ma, Cello Gronk? And would that make Yo-Yo Ma the new Drip King?
Substack Suggestions
Today, I’m featuring my bud
and her publication . Her most recent post covers physical media, and gave me major nostalgia for DVD menus and extras. Also, did you know there’s a Grammy for album liner notes?? Plus, you should also check out this post with a whole section about Blair Witch, and I learned a ton I didn’t know about the film!Randomly Selected Animal Cutie
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Oh. My. GOD. LOOK AT HIM!!!! The tiny little face!!! The CINCINNATI ZOO DOES IT AGAIN.
That’s all from me this week. It’s going to be HOT here this weekend, like REAL SUMMER (during the day, obvs). My ass is going to the pool.
K
AHH you are too kind!! Also, I am perpetually marveling the genius of Taco Bell's marketing team. Truly the frontrunner of the fast food establishments