Well, well, well, if it isn’t Friday again.
We have, once again, completed the never-ending cycle of me having way too much to do and then looking up and realizing an entire week has passed. It never ends!
This week has just been work, work, and more work. I feel like I’ve barely had time to do much outside of looking for content, corralling content, or editorializing said content. Three months in, and I still can’t believe this is literally my JOB?!
It’s the first month where I actually have an output goal at work, and it’s definitely kept me busy trying to make sure I stay far enough ahead to meet it. It’s going well and I don’t think I’ll have any trouble doing that, but…it’s a lot!
I’m hoping I’ll start to settle in to more of a routine with all of it sometime soon, where I can kind of manage to spread out the work throughout the month and also have more time to work on my personal creative projects. For now, though, I’m just kinda going with the flow and being on the internet 90% of the time.
So then, it’ll come as absolutely no surprise that I’ve got all kinds of goodies for y’all this week! Let’s get into ‘em:
Headline of the week
God, I love sharing niche Chicago drama with you guys almost as much as I love Chicago.
Of course I’ve got to start with a picture, so here it is, in all its glory:
A local podcaster and writer named Sam Greszes found the bag, saw it was full of Lucky Charms, snapped a pic, and posted it to Twitter, where tons of folks then made pilgrimages and took their own photos. The bag has since been moved, but it’s still in the neighborhood. This city is full of cool landmarks, but the ones Chicagoans truly love the most are the weirdest things imaginable.
It’s no rat hole, but it’ll do.
Scientific hubris
Apparently, scientists aren’t busy enough with like, researching solutions for climate change or cures for disease or how to get the texture right on a vegan hot dog.
No! No no no!
Mushrooms have their own lives to live!! They’ve got their own little ecosystem or whatever! They can eat radiation or ethanol and they can have our trash. Is that not enough for these monsters??
This feels like the part of the movie where *hubris* causes a scientist to be dicking around with something he absolutely should not be dicking around with. If it’s a real horror film, since I’m speaking out against this I’ll probably be the first one run over by a mushroom driving a giant Chevy Silverado, but that’s a chance I’ll have to take.
The next thing we know we’re going to be stuck behind a Chanterelle at a stoplight while it sprays spores out the driver’s side window and takes potshots at Pedro Pascal. Is that what you want, SCIENTISTS?? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
Stop the madness! No fungi behind the wheel!!
Sadly, that’s not the only bizarre scientific discovery of late:
Do you think the mice that were stealing my Doritos knew about this?? I mean, I love a little mouse as much at the next guy, but I definitely do not need to see its insides.
Few things in the world gross me out more than the sight or thought of organs. I do not need a constant awareness of the little meat bits doing things inside my person. Especially the idea that one of them is CURRENTLY IN CHARGE OF MY EVERY MOVEMENT AND THOUGHT. And like, the absolute last thing I want is to SEE any of them. Ever.
What if we just ate the chips and never spoke of this again?
Nostalgia corner
Thanks to what I can only assume is this post I made with a tiny reference to these bad boys in 2022 in which I conjectured that a single Altoid Sour would have killed Mozart, ALTOID SOURS ARE COMING BACK. We did it, Joe!!
Okay, sure — they’ve had a small rebrand, they’re only being sold at Cracker Barrel for some reason, and one flavor is mysteriously absent… 🤔
But I refuse to let any of those issues stop me from celebrating this victory for millennial nostalgia!!
I can’t think of a better reason to drive to a Cracker Barrel Old Country Store in the ‘burbs so I can pick up a tin of these beauties, a wooden golf peg game, and a gigantic rocking chair that won’t fit in my apartment.
Good read(s)
I’ve got two excellent reads for you from the NY Times this week: one about how worthless pennies are, and the other about how our butts are going dead from sitting too much. Both are gift links, so click away!
I’d love to tell you that after reading the dead butt article that I’m currently standing and taking excellent care of my glutes, but I am indeed seated (as always), unmoving, allowing my lower half to slowly atrophy into a giant flesh glob. That’s what computer chairs are for, right?
Oh, and this is definitely a watch, not a read — but I needed a spot to add in that a guy tried the Oreo-flavored Coke and he said it was actually good. Suspicious.
Randomly selected animal cutie
A new adorable baby (pygmy) hippo challenger has appeared!!
Meet Moo Deng!
Moo Deng was born on June 10th at the Khao Kheow Open Zoo in Thailand, and her name means “Bouncy Pig.” 🥹 She’s become HUGELY popular almost immediately because she’s a) adorable and b) sassy. Just look at her! She is beauty, she is grace.
This is an actual ad from Sephora Thailand:
Moo Deng is everywhere. See for yourself: Moo Deng in the bath. Moo Deng running around and looking like a little bug. Moo Deng getting her tiny belly rubbed. Moo Deng climbing up a tiny wall in her enclosure. Moo Deng getting her little chin scratched and yawning.
And one adorable bonus: Moo Deng latte art. I love her forever.
That’s it from me! I’m off to finish up my workday, dive into a book I’m reading for book club, and watch more videos of Moo Deng. Hope you have an excellent weekend!
K
OH MY GOD Kelley thank you this made my week. Time to get myself and one of my many millennial tote bags to a Cracker Barrel posthaste.
I love that you don't know if the bag of Lucky Charms was put there by an artist or a crack head.